Because I had a lot of it, it was so delicious...
I had the strangest dream last night. It was kind of horrible. But it wasn't your typical nightmare.
I was in the school van and I had my cello with me. There were a couple of other people in the van with me. The choir director and the band director of my school, and for a short while my orchestra director was there, but she had to leave during the dream. There were also some students. We were heading to Oelwein again for all-state auditions. Apparently, because I'm a 17 year old senior and will start college before I turn 18 (it's a dream, so this makes sense), I had the oppertunity to audition for the next all-state. I was on the van on the way there, and I hadn't known about it until that moment. I had to prepare a solo, I had never seen the excerpts (though when I did see them, they were REALLY REALLY easy), but the solo was what was going to get me in. I asked if I could just play my solo from the last time, and I never got a clear answer. It created a lot of anxiety, the whole deal. I wanted to make it in again, be a part of the all-state orchestra (because it was AMAZING), but I didn't want to audition! I hate going through the auditions, having to play your very very best, which takes a LOT of energy. And in the dream I was saying "I'm too tired to play my best, don't you know I just had a lot to eat for Thanksgiving and turkey makes you tired???" (we had an odd discussion about that at dinner.) But I really wanted to make it, but it was so stressful. I got to the school in Oelwein and set up, but this girl who I compete with a lot on cello (and who I've been passing, despite her having played cello about 4-5 years longer than I have-she really does exist and that's really how it is) was really angry that I was there. <:(
It wasn't a happy dream.
I'm glad it was just a dream.
But I hate dreams that cause so much anxiety like that. So much worry and stress... ugggg
So to clear my mind I'm going to bring down all the Christmas decorations from the attic and play Christmas music. :)
Friday, November 28, 2008
Was it something in the turkey stuffing?
at 12:14 PM
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